Tuesday, 23 December 2008

My Birth Mother

I met with my birth mother last night.  Her and her son came round for the evening.

We had a really nice evening.

It is a strange thing meeting up with your birth mother!  It's difficult to get my head round how I feel about her.  I really like her and have no feelings whatsoever of bitterness or anything like that. I know that her decision to give me and Tom up for adoption was the best one.  The thing I struggle with is what do I feel about her?

Last night she was chatting about how she had spoken to my birth father recently (they split up when she fell pregnant with me and Tom) and  how they had a really good conversation and time of healing over giving me and Tom up for adoption.  When she was talking about it I felt like she was talking about some other twins.  There was times last night that I forgot she had given birth to me.

The thing is, I have an amazing mum and dad.  I had a wonderful childhood.  My mum is a star. So when I meet with my birth mother I have no desire to make a mum, because I already have a mum.  Yet I want to have a good relationship with my birth mother.  I think we do.  It was a really nice evening last night.

Its fascinating discovering about nature and nurture too.  Sarah was saying when we went to bed how I'm so like my mum (stubborn and a thinker) in some ways (nurture) but then she can see things in me that remind her of my birth mother (artistic and deep) in other ways (nature).

I know this post is a bit muddled but I'm just writing as I'm thinking.  I will go into more depth another day about my adoption and my birth family.  It is quite complicated and very interesting!  My birth family have a fascinating history.

Shalom

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